Thursday, March 25, 2010

Reservation and Situation of Women

“Aisi ladkiyan ayengi...udyogpatiyon ki, bade bade sarakari afsaron ki...sansad mein...aisi ladkiyon ko dekh kar ladke citi bajayenge pichhe se...haan...aap dekhlijiyega," this is what Mr. Mulayam Singh has proposed as one of his logic for his opposition to Women reservation in the parliament. Now most of the feminist and people with self claimed common sense are deriding him for his cheap mentality and sexism.

But why do we forget that this is not only Mulayam Singh, who thinks in this way, but there are millions of Mr. Kathor, who have elected such leaders, are also having the same opinion. It is true to some extent that females are teased, stared at, and commented upon, and even harassed by few sick men, who probably think that this is the only way, by which they can prove their manliness. Now the most problematic part is not that women have to face such obnoxious elements but the acceptance of the parents of the girls and society in general, that only way to avoid these situations is to keep their Bahu-Betis locked into their houses, instead of fighting for their rightful space in the world. It is not only parents and elders who try to restrict the women, but the females themselves do not come forward and become the party in their own oppression.

There are many such incidents which I’ve seen and felt myself. First is education. Why do we need separated educational institutes for women? Why don’t we encourage them to study in the co-ed school and colleges, where they can grow on par with men? Yes, as I said earlier, there are many problem related to unruly psychos and accommodation in cities. But the main problem is that parents don’t have trust on their own blood. Some of them think if they send their girls to co-ed institutions, they may get involved with boys of different castes and social status. This will tarnish their reputation in the society. They don’t say it to their daughters clearly but they understand it quite well and convince themselves that they are supposed to be like that only.

Next problem is that for some unknown reason females try to hide themselves behind veil instead of coming in public and face the world as it is. I’ve seen most of the women in my village, including in my own family, covering their faces in front of males. When I ask them why it is so, the only answer that comes is that they are supposed to be like that for cultural reasons. Its not only limited to uneducated and village women. We see on the social networking websites that most of the female profiles have hidden their faces in the garb of some different pictures then their own. Why is it so? Yes, I understand that there is a continuous nuisance of hundreds of freiendophiles, who are not on friendly terms with their own female family members but want the unknown females to be their friends without even knowing. There may be chances of misusing the photos by some maniacs. But this doesn’t mean that females should just loose their identities and hide themselves behind the flowers and animations. There is a real need on their part to come forward and fight the world.

Now the solutions, as I can see, lie not in reservations in education institutes, jobs, transportation, or even in legislative assemblies or in the parliament, but in the equal encouragement and opportunity given to females at home, to begin with. In making the girls believe that they can be as good as boys and in raising the girls as tough as boys, instead of asking for reservations for them. By encouraging them for higher education rather than marrying them to suitable boys at young age.

But the irony is that I don't see it happening very soon. It is going to take time. We cant go back and change what has happened till now, but we can surely change our attitude towards women and make the difference in the times to come :)

Tuesday, March 23, 2010

Garlands !!!

News Bees have settled down now in their new hives after buzzing for a couple of days over Maya madam's head. It was an ingenuous marketing lesson that should have been taken by aspiring managers. How effectively had Behanji used her garlands made of currency notes to garner lots of airtime and space across media, worth crores.

However the matter of my curiosity is neither Mayaji nor the Currency notes. Its about the Malas(Chains) made of different materials. Why we, in India, are so much infatuated with these garlands? Since the child is born to the time (s)he remains only in pictures and statues. It is tied with garlands. How do people feel when they are garlanded or they garland someone? Really, I mean, does it give some pleasure which I'm depriving myself till now.

If you have had any opportunity may share your experience :)

Monday, March 15, 2010

What exactly are we looking for?

This is not the first time I’ve been asked or I’ve asked this question myself. Ever since I’m conscious of myself, I’ve no idea what I’ve been looking for exactly. Many times, it has been like reaching the goal and then turning back and saying to myself, hey is it something you wanted?. Or in easy terms it’s like a dog chasing a car only to come back where he started from.

The reason of behaving this way may be curiosity, distraction, shifting goal posts or simply lack of self confidence. Another reason for this may be starting on the task without having clear understanding of the results, or doing something just because others are doing it. One more reason that is more important is that you don’t know how to say NO to your very own people, whom you don’t want to hurt, have asked you to take on the task without considering your interests and you start on it because you, yourself don’t know what is to be done.

Oops lets me close this post here.....I don’t know why I’m writing this ....and even you! why are you reading this...if you have the reason write down in the comments below.

Thursday, March 04, 2010

Writing as a Hobby

You know what; writing is my hobby, that’s what I say when someone asks me about it. But I’m not sincere about it at all. Though there are couple of incidences about my writings which I remember fondly and am going to share now.

First Diary: When I was around 10. I saw two diaries in my father’s suitcase. Let me say one big one (A) and another smaller one (B). I used to wonder what did he write in them? Why kept in locked almirah? So one day I discovered where he kept the key. Next day, I got my hand on the key when he left for school (He is a teacher), opened the almirah carefully such that no one in the home could see me, and then took out the diaries. I don’t remember exactly what was written in B, it was almost blank, but A had something interesting. In the front pages there were some tables full of numbers, probably about his salary, expenses, month wise for past 5-6 years running thorough many pages. And then as I turned pages from the end side. There were around 10 pages full of Hindi songs’ lyrics of Manoj Kumar type movies, written immaculately. It was totally unexpected, as I never heard him singing or even humming. All he used to do was listening to News on Radio. So I just put back the diaries and closed the almirah and took the key with me completely forgetting that I’d to put it back. In the evening he might have searched for the key. He looked around and then noticed something in my shirt’s pocket. Here it is! "Why did you take it? Did you steal something from there", He asked. “I wanted to see the diaries”, I said. “I want the smaller one, its empty!” I continued with the demand till he got me a diary. For that he just cut few A4 size papers in 4 pieces each, pinned them together. Then gave me, my first little Diary, saying, "Get yourself a Big one when you go to college". After some time he wanted to see what I’d written in that? It was full of details about the songs, like title, singer, Music Director, Movie Name, which I used to listen on the radio or watch in Chitrahar and Rangoli on DD-1. All he gave in return was a Smile! I had a totally unheard of hobby....collecting song details.

First Letter: Letter writing was taught in primary school and then repeatedly in every Hindi and English class before exams. But It was around 4 years later than the unique hobby, at the dawn of adolescence. The letter was to be written to impress the recipient. To tell her that how much I admired her smile and what did she mean to me. It took 2 days of calligraphy to write those 3 pages, and one more day to draw the symbol of heart pierced by an arrow. On Jan 14th, I thought,” Today is the Valentine day celebration as we celebrate Makar-Sankaranti”. I handed over it to her in front of whole class. Most of the female classmates got their hearts broken as they saw a drawing on the last page. For next few weeks quite of a hailstorm was raised by my schoolmates whom I used to consider my best friends. Letters continued till I got my mobile, but recipients kept changing.

First Essay: Just like letters, Essays too used to come in exams, but this time it was different. It was an Essay writing competition. We, the class 11-12th students, were given few topics. I chose to write on “India’s Population problem and possible solution”. It was to be written in about 1000 words. But what I submitted was a total mess. It ran through at least 15 pages, I wrote whatever I could think of, examples of families I which had abnormal sizes with dozens of children. Examples how a limited family can have batter share of available resources...etc. After a week the evaluator came with the result. I obviously didn’t win the prize. But he asked in the class,”Who has written this drama?”

First Novel: This is something still to be finished; Last year He got the idea to begin on this. He found the topic, even the characters were decided. Story was progressing well, Characters behaved as they should have naturally. Their conversations were recorded. However in the end one of the characters requested another, “Please do whatever in your life but don’t become a writer”. He still doesn’t understand what arose this plea. And He said “Don’t worry I won’t”. Ever! So probably this dream will be unfulfilled unless new characters are found.

PS: Report the mistakes in the comments below, I've got 99.18 percentile in verbal section in CAT-09. but you understand well that exams can never check a person's mistakes...they are bound to be there.